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Archive for the ‘S/M’ Category

Sometimes you will notice gays walking down the street wearing S&M regalia such as a black leather biker hat, cross-hatched chest bracelets, or assless chaps. You cannot chat with these gays randomly, even if the gay-friendly friend you are having coffee with knows the couple. You must wait to be introduced and try to identify who is in charge, avoiding all eye contact with the subordinate gay. This is usually quite easy, as there will be an identifiable feature like a leash or a standing order that territorially demarcates who’s on top.

The gay wearing the collar and/or standing just behind or off to the side of the friendly one is the subordinate. You can freely address the dominant gay, but typically, you should avoid asking about the subordinate until he is mentioned in conversation. If the dominant wants to bring his pet into the sidewalk banter, he’ll address his partner himself.

Though this game might appear to be fun, and you may well be tempted to try your hand at subservience or dominance, do not in any way mess with the dynamics exhibited before you. This couple will permanently remain an insular one unless they ask you over for tea or to try out their new jacuzzi. Until then, you must find your own playmate to practice S&M techniques on and leave these gays alone.

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